While summer may seem like a season of rest, relaxation, and rejuvenation, its other side may not be as happy. Statistics show that July is considered divorce month, and there could be several reasons for this. One of them is that couples spend more time together and have many aspirations for a summer vacation, but instead find themselves faced with all the unresolved issues they haven’t had time to discuss during their busy schedules. Let’s explore why summer divorces are so common in the Northern Hemisphere.
How does spending time together cause problems?
Many people believe that spending more time together strengthens their relationship, increases understanding, and deepens the level of partnership. However, the opposite usually happens. Spending long periods together increases disagreements and boredom, highlights unresolved issues, and exposes hidden and accumulated ones.
The more interaction between spouses, the greater the chance of disputes and misunderstandings. Small actions can be magnified and given more importance than they deserve. Furthermore, the personal characteristics that irritate each spouse in the other become more prominent.
All of this can lead to an explosion that leads to divorce over the most trivial reasons.
Hot weather increases psychological distress
Hot weather increases feelings of anxiety, tension, and emotional agitation. It stimulates the production of cortisol, known as the stress hormone, and reduces the production of serotonin, which is responsible for feelings of happiness and contentment.
All of this can make minor disagreements and trivial matters seem like triggers for anger, leading to arguments that may lead to divorce.
Summer Expenses and Increased Financial Burdens
Vacations require a lot of expenses, as many people resort to traveling to beaches, enjoying the sea and the fresh air, and providing comfort and happiness for their children during the vacation period.
Even while spending time at home, rising electricity prices make the use of air conditioners and refrigerators an additional expense that burdens spouses during the summer vacation period.
If the family is already suffering from financial crises or disagreements over expenses and spending, the situation can escalate at any moment, causing a marriage crisis.
Unrealistic expectations lead to disappointment
Some people live in hope that the summer vacation will come, allowing themselves to indulge and live the dream they long for, without any problems or frustrations.
However, this dreamy image quickly evaporates when faced with reality. You may suffer from high costs, find the summer vacation doesn’t live up to expectations, and your partner may not be ready to meet your dreams, exhausted and in desperate need of peace and rest. All of this can generate discord and blame between the two parties, escalating matters to the point of divorce.
The Stress of Round-the-Day Childcare
Children spending their summer vacation at home can increase the burden on parents, draining their energy and reducing their resilience.
If one parent is shouldering the burden of childcare, this can exacerbate the situation and lead to disagreements and arguments that may lead to separation.
Social Comparisons Enforced by Social Media
When each family starts posting videos and photos of their vacations, some may fall into the trap of comparisons and quarrels begin. “Why do these people get to have their dream vacation while I can’t have the vacation I desire or deserve?”
This may lead some to believe that their partner is to blame for this, as they didn’t give them the opportunity to present this wonderful image of a perfect life and a wonderful vacation. This can lead to disagreements that may even lead to divorce.
How to avoid a visit to a divorce lawyer during July?
To avoid falling into the summer divorce trap, spouses can follow some practical steps that enhance mutual understanding and reduce tension, the most important of which are:
Positive and Effective Communication
Before the summer vacation begins, spouses should communicate clearly with each other about the vacation location, their financial circumstances, and the type of vacation they can take without incurring negative financial burdens. Each spouse should try to understand the other’s point of view and maintain an equal distance from their aspirations to reach a point of understanding.
Set realistic expectations
If you’re not planning to study family law this summer, know that nothing is without its downsides, and that the vacation of your dreams isn’t always possible.
Focus on the positives, enjoy what you have, and deal with the challenges you and your partner face as a supportive team.
Plan ahead for your summer vacation
You should plan wisely for your summer vacation, both financially and in terms of how you’ll spend it, taking care of your children, and calculating the costs of transportation, accommodation, and electricity.
This can make things much easier and make your expectations realistic for you and your family.
Try to make time for your partner to restore the spark in your relationship
While it’s important to take care of the children and spend time with family and friends, it’s also important to make time for your partner, whether through a romantic evening out or a romantic dinner after the kids go to bed, to restore the atmosphere of intimacy and understanding to your relationship.
Remember that life is a shared responsibility
Family life is a shared responsibility. No one should burden the other with the heaviest burden, as this could spark heated arguments at some point. You can distribute family tasks by rotating them, or have each partner take on a set of tasks equitably.
Dealing with Disagreements Wisely
Disagreements and problems should be dealt with without shouting or blaming the other party. Instead of focusing on who is at fault, focus on finding solutions and finding common ground. The goal should remain resolving the dispute, not achieving some kind of victory.
Find a personal outlet
Each partner should find a personal hobby to pursue away from the other, and encourage each other to do so.
And stop comparing yourselves to any other couple, because not everything people show on social media is real.
This way, couples can enjoy a safe and peaceful summer and get through July together in peace and harmony.
